


Woobie Caritas

by Rod



Series: Parallel Lines [30]
Category: Veritas: The Quest
Genre: Comfort/Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-24
Updated: 2013-05-24
Packaged: 2017-12-12 19:26:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/815140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rod/pseuds/Rod
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est.<br/><i>Where there is love and caring, God is there.</i><br/>— Traditional Latin hymn.</p>
</blockquote>
            </blockquote>





	Woobie Caritas

Nikko's brooding, and Cal's had enough of it. He's aware that he's being a little hypocritical given that he spent the last month brooding and he's barely given Nikko twenty four hours, but there are extenuating circumstances. He was nobly trying to put the Foundation ahead of his personal life; Nikko is just having an existential crisis.

Right at the moment, Nikko is sitting on the couch, staring at the fire as if it held all the answers. Cal doesn't give him any warning; he just sits down right beside Nikko and demands his attention, because he does hold all the answers.

"The way I see it," he says without preamble, "it doesn't matter." He's got more, but Nikko doesn't let him say it.

"Don't you see, Cal? I thought I was doing all this because it was what I wanted. Now I find out that everything I thought was me was just a premonition of this place. I manipulated you into coming here, having sex with me, and I don't know any more—"

"Yeah," Cal interrupts, "you can be a conniving little S.O.B. Tell me something that I haven't known since I met you."

For a moment Nikko looks stung enough to launch into one of their usual squabbles, and Cal allows himself to hope at the normalcy of it all. Then Nikko sags as the fight leaks out of him. "I seduced you, Cal," he says, sounding sad and pathetic, "and for what? I don't know why I'm doing anything any more."

Cal suddenly gets it. Nikko thought he understood where he was with his dad, with Veritas, hell even with Cal; he had a _purpose_ , and Cal remembers what that felt like the first time he went into the field with Dr Zond. This precognitive dream of his has thrown all that into doubt; Nikko can't tell whether he knows something because it's real, or because he wants it to be real, or because he's dreamed that it's going to be real.

"If you think that jumping me in a back alley counts as seduction," he says, buying a little time while he thinks, "you seriously need to work on your technique. Anyway, none of that is relevant to here and now. Never mind how we got here, what do you want right now?"

Just for a second, Cal can see everything in Nikko's eyes; need, hope, fear, everything. Just for a second, before misery closes it all down again, but that second tells Cal that what he'd hoped for is true. Nikko still wants him.

"But it does matter how we got here," Nikko protests. "How can you know that what you're feeling is real?"

"Because I'm feeling it," Cal says simply. He's never been big on the more self-absorbed philosophers anyway. "Look, when did you start on this grand evil plot to seduce me into your bed?"

"Months ago," Nikko says miserably, and Cal can feel the guilt oozing off him. He manages not to laugh, instead looking steadily at Nikko until he gets a more specific answer. "About a week after we got back from the hidden Templar castle."

Cal thinks through the timeline, and can't help smiling when he works it out. "The week before we went there I was seriously considering quitting," he says. "After Sophie, I didn't think I could take it if anything happened to you."

Nikko blinks, and for the first time lets hope stay on his face for more than a few seconds. "You mean you..."

Cal nods. "I've mooning over you for a long time. Now, how do you feel?"

"Stupid."

Nikko's smiling though, and Cal knows he's got through. "I was hoping for something a bit more romantic," he says. "Something about your incredibly brilliant and good-looking boyfriend, maybe."

He gets a kiss for that, albeit a gentle one on his cheek rather than the get-your-clothes-off-now kiss he was hoping for. Nikko smiles at him, shaking his head ruefully. "What did I do to deserve you?" he asks.

"You didn't take 'No' for an answer," Cal tells him honestly. He's the idiot who would have thrown this all away despite how he feels, how he's always felt. On impulse he pulls Nikko closer, kissing the top of his head and holding him tight. Nikko nestles into him, resting his head on Cal's chest, apparently content this once to be comforted.

They sit like this for a long time. Cal can't believe how contented he feels just holding Nikko, just knowing that he's there. If he needed any proof that it's not just about sex, that Nikko really means something to him, it's right here. Eventually, however, reality intrudes on his thoughts. It's the curse of being the older and more responsible one of them, he supposes.

"We have to head home tomorrow," he says with a sigh.

"Mm," Nikko agrees, sounding a little muffled against Cal's sweater. "I wish we could stay."

"Me too," Cal says, half a dozen reasons why that would a Really Good Idea crowding into his mind. "Your dad is going to flip."

"So we don't tell him."

"Huh?"

Nikko shifts finally so that he can look up at Cal. "You're right, Dad has freaked out enough when I've tried chatting up girls. Neither of us want the drama that he'd make this into. So we don't tell him."

"So what, we sneak around behind his back?" Cal has thought the same thing himself, but he's a lot more dubious about it than Nikko seems to be. He's given his heart to this impulsive, headstrong kid, but that's not a list of qualities that really go with sneaking around.

"You think you can't keep your hands off my sexy bod?" Nikko asks with a smirk.

Cal rolls his eyes. "I have got some willpower, brat," he says affectionately. "How about you?"

"For this, for us, I can do it," Nikko says, abruptly serious and sincere. Cal mentally adds 'mercurial' to the list of things he loves about Nikko. "We can do this. We just have to introduce Dad to the idea gently and he'll be OK."

Cal shudders at the thought of introducing Dr Zond to the idea of them as a couple at all, and then again at the idea of them doing it gently. Nikko is many wonderful things, but 'subtle' isn't one of them. "We'd better take our time with that," he temporises.

Nikko rolls his eyes, no doubt thinking that Cal's being a wuss, but he lets the comment slide. "Anyway," he says firmly, "tomorrow is tomorrow. Tonight... hold me?"

"Gladly," Cal says, and means it.

As they get comfortable again, Cal thinks about how unbelievable this all is, how even a year ago he'd never expected to feel this happy, especially not with a guy, and doubly not with his boss's son. But he is; right now tomorrow is tomorrow, and Nikko is in his arms, and he'll carry this moment with him for the rest of his life.


End file.
